People say, all the time that ‘if you have the will to do something, you will and you can do it.’ But it’s not necessary true. Most people want to exercise every morning but they don’t. Most people would like to eat healthier but they don’t. Most people want to go to bed earlier but they don’t.
Why the disconnect?
It turns out much of our will power is not up us. Studies show that:
- People who are better at self-control actually enjoy the activities some of us resist – like eating healthy, studying, or exercising.
- People who are good at self-control have learned better habits.
- Some people just experience fewer temptations.
- It’s easier to have self-control when you’re wealthy.
Self-control involve other things other than self!
In a specific situation, sure, you can muster willpower to save yourself from falling back into a bad habit. But relying on willpower alone to accomplish goals “is almost like relying on emergency brake when you are driving your car,” Saunders says. “You should focus on things that drive you toward your goals rather than stopping things that are in your way.” What’s more, the human “emergency brake” that is willpower is bound to fail in some instances, causing you to crash.
And it’s time we all took these lessons to heart. Focusing on failures of willpower leads to shame, both public and private, and holds back our curiosity from finding and enacting solutions that actually work.
Find the article on this, here.