You can be.
You can be the kind of parents you wish you had. You can be supportive and loving. You can get your act together. You can provide. You can understand. And as they get older, you may well have the opportunity to be the grandparent you wish you had too—that fun, loving, wise resource that you didn’t get. You can be the extended family you never had.
Wishing gets us nowhere and nothing but resentment and frustration. But being? Well, that will make all the difference in the world. For them and for us.